The Pregnancy Diaries // no. 1
Pregnancy is such an insane concept! I'm 17 weeks along and still don't look the least bit pregnant until the end of the day when I'm extremely bloated. And then, surprise! I wake up in the morning with the same sized belly I've always had. My favorite is mornings. I can run my hand down my stomach and feel a little bump where baby is growing. You can't see it, but you can definitely feel it in the morning before I've had anything to eat. I always spend a few minutes rubbing that little spot and thinking about the future. Sometimes I'll go over names we've been thinking of, sometimes it's a bit of worry that something could be wrong, sometimes it's "am I technically a mother already?". I can't wait to really start showing instead of looking like I ate too much Taco Bell.
People weren't kidding when they say the unwanted advice and judgements start early! I'm doing my best to just tune out the negativity and all the "warnings" people keep giving me. And let's just say the belly rubbing is a lot weirder than I expected it to be. I think it's because I don't really have a bump, so people rubbing my belly fat is uncomfortable. Fair warning: unless you put the baby in there, there's a chance I'm going to rub your belly back to show you how awkward it is!
Blaine and I have talked names and have a first name for a boy locked down, but can't seem to agree on a girl name. It's funny because when we used to daydream about our hypothetical children we would always say that we like girl names better so we better just have girls. I'm not too worried about taking seriously about it until find out the gender in two weeks.
I've been trying to eat better and not think too hard about what I'm going to eat. At the very beginning I basically couldn't eat anything and would have to force food (crackers) down my throat. Then I started craving certain things and that's all I ate. Then I started getting to be better with food in general, but certain things would gross me out or I'd feel perfectly fine while eating and ten minutes later I'd be emptying my stomach into the toilet. Now I can eat most food without getting grossed out, but there's a huge difference between eating something and enjoying something. And oh, the frequency. I'm almost never full. I could eat all day, but it's difficult to find food that I don't mind eating all day. I feel my best when I eat every 2-3 hours so I really do my best to keep something in my stomach. Up until probably 2 weeks ago I was eating really unhealthy because I couldn't eat anything else and now I'm happy to be able to slowly transition to eating relatively healthy. I'm hoping green smoothies, veggies and salads will start to sound good to me again sometime soon!
It's been nice being (mostly) back to my old self in relation to energy and motivation. For the months November and December I didn't even want to look at a computer, let alone sit on one working for hours. Now I have most of my motivation back, though I do my best not to sit on the computer all day. I might even have more motivation now that I have a growing baby to care for in the future. The plan was always for me to work from home so I could be home with any future children so this is my time to get things going!
Overall, though I feel pretty gross on a daily basis, this pregnancy has been okay. I complain a lot, but I know it could be worse! I don't have anything to compare to, but talking to other moms and pregnant buddies I know there are worse things and as long as my little one is healthy I'm good!
Right now (me):
- not showing
- major bloating by end of day
- "swampy"/bubbly stomach most days, but not as intense as it was a few weeks ago
- excess saliva is still present (and annoying)
- weird taste in mouth seems to be getting better, but still there most of the day
- bras are suffocating
- most of my pants still fit, though they're pretty snug
- nurse was impressed my pants still fit (ha!)
- up about 6 pounds
- taco bell 7 layer burritos are my go-to when nothing sounds good
- bagel with an egg for breakfast daily
- fruit tastes so good, but makes my stomach feel gross
- always hungry (stomach), but can't always find something that sounds appealing
Right now (baby):
- about the size of an onion/5 inches
- around 5-6 oz in weight
- no definite movement felt yet (a few maybes)
This was such a scattered, brain dump of a post. I don't plan to update weekly or anything, but I do want to update about the pregnancy as we move along and hit different milestones. Next exciting event? Our ultrasound in 2 weeks and finding out the gender. The last time we had an ultrasound I was 8 weeks along and baby looked like nothing more than a blob on the screen. We're pretty excited to see him or her again soon!